Posted on

Special, But Scared

Hey guys! Okay so in all realness here, I’m actually quite stressed, and nervous as all get out about writing this right now. I have been talking about starting a blog for a cool like year now and have been procrastinating TO THE FULLEST about starting it, but I always felt that I should. I believe there is something in me that needs to get out. So, after much forcing by my family (which I am grateful for, for the most part) it’s happening so here goes nothing. For starters, if you don’t know me, my name is Teya. I am 20 years old, have 5 of the greatest people on the planet as siblings, and am in probably the weirdest state of life right now. It’s like that state where you KIND OF know what you want to do but like not really. It’s like you have an idea of what it is, but can kind of get lost in figuring out how and where to start. And you look around and it seems like everyone is ahead of you and knows exactly what they want to do and how to do it and you’re just there like, well, I mean, I’m really good at doing laundry and am exceptional in the unique art of napping. lol let me just tell you right now you are NOT alone okay? We are in the same boat! But I’ll tell you right now, we gone figure this thing out, that’s a fact! Creating this blog is causing me to stretch myself and release that “special” thing that is inside of me even though I’m scared. What is your special thing and when will you release it? Let’s do it together! This week I want to challenge you to do something that releases your special and shrinks your scared. Leave a comment here or on my social media and let me know what that is going to be for you, no matter how big or small!

43 thoughts on “Special, But Scared”

  2. Wowow such a courageous and wonderful blog. I see and feel amazing things for you in the future. I can’t wait for the posts in the future. Horray Horray horray

    Like

    Reply

  4. So recently a lot of people have been telling me that I should write a book. But I’m like nah bruh because I don’t like to be that vulnerable. I recently started seeing a counselor because of a few issue have started to come up again. I’m scared to let people in but I know it could definitely help others.

    Like

    Reply

    1. Hey! It takes a lot of bravery to go and see a counselor when you see an issue popping up so snaps to you! Thats the first step! The way I like to see it is that being vulnerable is a strength disguised as a weakness. If you feel led to write the book, I believe that you have to think of the people who are going to benefit from your book as more important than your own fears. Which is SO MUCH easier said than done, but I believe if you get into the practice of doing that, you’ll win! But we are all in this together. Conquering our fears together! 🙂

      Like

      Reply

  5. well i like spoken word poetry. i write but im not that great at it.i am going to take classes for it, howveere i want to have a career in politics.. because i feel like alot of people of color is not enough of us in there. i want to enforce change…

    Like

    Reply

    1. Well that’s great that you are taking classes to get better at writing! And what you said is very true! Wanting to represent your people is an honorable thing. Go in the lane you feel most called to.

      Like

      Reply

  7. That was a super awesome read!! It really gives me my motivation because God has called me to do. A womens brunch and I have never really talked in front of a whole group of ppl about anything lol so its nerve wrecking I’m scared but I’m going to leap anyway and make the most of it and start sending the flyers out. So with this lost lets me know you did what was scary but you did it and so can I so here we go 1,2,3 JUMP

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  8. Hey Teya
    COOL IDEA!So many people are on a Journey to finding themselves I recently (2 wks ago) moved me and my 3 yr old son from our hometown Syracuse N.Y. to Los Angeles California to pursue my dreams of becoming an actress I’m looking for acting to be a platform so I can be an apple seed in my community I’m sacrificing everyday to give myself and my son a better life and I’m allowing my Instagram followers to see every step of my journey the good the bad and the ugly. By submitting to the holy spirit everyday God has connected me with his people and taken care of me every step of the way I don’t know what tomorrow holds I just know everything will be alright. So I know my niche I’m a natural actor my personality screams it lol I also give 10x more than I take I want to make the world a better place by starting with me. Any woman I see striving to achieve success is inspiring to me thank you for the Inspiration.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  9. Congrats on starting your blog! I was in the same boat as you a year ago and was very nervous about starting one as well. I wasn’t sure how much personal information to release into the world. But I decided to put my fear and procrastination to the side and started my own blog in February. I’m so glad you did it. Keep writing!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  10. Hey Teya!! First and foremost shout out to you for stepping out on faith and allowing yourself to be stretched! I’ve been where you are before, and have actually found myself there again. Im 33 so the good news is at 20 you still have plenty of time to take a few naps…try a few different things and still get it all figured out. The thing I’ve been doing to release my special is getting serious about my love of writing. I spend time on some part of it everyday. The best thing I know to do is to make a decision to choose faith over fear daily. Sounds easy enough, right? It’s not always the easiest thing to do, but I have found that it produces results; no matter how small. Congratulations on starting your blog, and I pray you continue to be lead into your God given purpose! Always remember that everything you need is already inside of You!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  11. absolutely love this, i’m in the same boat girl but I know we aren’t alone. God is directing every step, every decision, every thing we do to only be lights in this broken world! So excited to read more ❤️

    Like

    Reply

  12. Soar On Teya!! I’m excited to take this journey with you!!
    I am also encouraged to continue in my own writing journey and continue to be uncomfortable! …. Let’s
    S T R E T C H HHHHHH Sis!
    Sending loads of hope your way,! Let’s GOOOOOOOO!😆✨

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  14. Wow I think that is awesome that you are stepping out on faith and really trusting God to move in a miraculous way. I’m excited for what you are starting. I am at the same stage of my life right now. I’m really trying to allow God to use me but there is a dark process that I have to go through first so he can truly develop the gifts and talents that are within me. So I definitely feel you on how fear can grip and the enemy can plant seeds of deception to incept our God given vision and plans. I’ve found that when we are on the verge of becoming who God has called us to be that’s when we are under full attack but this is also where we are seek God’s face so that He shows the plans that He has for us. We don’t come under attack unless we are a threat to the enemy. So stay strong sister and fight on!!!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  16. Teya, I felt so alone until now. I have so many gifts and I’ve reached a point in life where I can’t figure out how to effectively use them. Everything I’ve tried in the last year, failed. I’m afraid to try again or be excited because I don’t want to feel the disappointment of losing again. I’m 31 and both of my parents are deceased. I have 2 daughters and I’m in dire need of God to elevate me! Thank you so much for this. I’m looking forward to taking this journey with you!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  17. I am in that same season! Thank you sharing. I have lately been feeling discouraged like my writing isn’t getting anywhere. & I have testimonies & lessons I want to share but the thought of recording myself gives me anxiety. I’m working on stretching myself in these areas

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  18. Hi girl! Amazing step you’re taking! Last year I had kind of the same feeling! I have something I need to put out there! I started a blog too! But somewhere my ‘scared’ won and I stopped for a couple of months. This week I decided to write again and defeat that scared 😀 You go girl! Be your own kinda you!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  19. Congratulations on your courage! It’s funny how God works, I’ve been led to start a blog to write and inspire as well. I finally took that leap of faith this week! Looking forward to seeing how your journey unfolds, while mine also does ❤️ God bless you!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  21. Hey Teya. So you’re honesty was just like a shot in the arm for me. I’m in a place of transition and desperately needing to know timeline to make the transition complete. I’m excited and scared at the same time because I’ll be walking into a place that I’m totally unfamiliar with, and can’t rely on my own strength to execute (help me Jesus!) You’ve got company, so let’s walk!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  23. Teya! I’m so proud of you! I look forward to journeying with you to your special even while scared! I’m excited to see how things pan out for you. 😘

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  25. Mee too! Sigh..! Right now I feel ao weary in the process. I just don’t know… Then I’m like ‘God, You never allowed me to survive this journey up until now for nothing. Like God, I’m a little frustrated now, was all those tears for nothing? Lord, please help me to find the path. I’m getting weary Lord, I know it ain’t all for nothing… please help me.’ And I feel stuck in ‘well what do I do now Lord’.
    This blog encourages me. We shall find it! ❤
    Love you girly,
    Jaz from Jamaica

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  26. Yeah Teya, when i tell you i am right there with you. I am right there with you honey! you took the first step that i myself am scared to do and that is stepping out. But i believe i am about to do the same right there with you !

    thank you for this, keep them coming!

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  27. We are all special either by gifts, talents, or circumstances. We are all brave the moment we decide to share our special with someone else. Depending on the circumstances and what we have to share we face scared. Well I myself am a survivor and a writer with a gift to inspire others to survive and change their story no matter what adversities they have been in. I have self published two books one about poetry called Spoken Woman and one on self Love after Abuse called it all comes out in the wash. .i’m currently trying to produce a play I wrote also. .i’m scared but I will prevail and share my gifts because someone needs it and needs me to inspire and help there special be set free.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  29. God is good! Thank you for sharing your story! I’m currently working on starting my blog and I feel exactly how you feel. As I was reading I ask my self “did she read my dairy” lol Let this path that god bless you in be amazing.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  31. I’m Trinity 🙂 So lately I’ve been contemplating becoming a gospel singer. I grew up with God in my life, had some bumpy eras, moments when I’ve left him behind, BUT right now in my life I feel my relationship with God is stronger than ever. Growing up I’ve always pretty much loved singing. I grew up eager to know so much about God. I’m fifteen now and all I do and think about is when I’m going to get back in church to experience praise and worship again (probably my favorite part of church, don’t get me wrong I love the word, but I aspired and love to sing!!) – I sang a gospel song for my talent show and people loved it. I went home the same night having contemplated on whether singing gospel was my calling and I prayed about it and asked God to deliver it to me. I know I’m only 15 and all probably always get the “just be a kid” speech but I believe I’m different. I believe God set a purpose on me in ministry. I love motivating others, it makes me smile (evangelicalism?) and I love God with everything. I don’t listen to any secular music, only Gospel. A spiritual motivation app (sprinkle of jesus) send out a a message one day saying “stop praying for a sign, they’re reactions gave you your answer” (could it have been from the talent show when everybody said my voice blessed them in some type of way, or that I was really God and that God truly has blessed me?) another message said “don’t let your insecurities get in the way of Gods calling for you” (I get insecure sometimes, scared that if I put everything into this, it won’t work. I always get someone telling me “If it’s for God, he will bring you through, it will work it’s way” but I’m not sure:/) ( Where those massages from God answering my prayers, or was it just the next message they had in their queue for the next day and it happened to be coincidental?) I don’t want to disappoint God nor myself. There’s so many amazing singers out here today, sometimes I think would I truly make it. I love Church, it’s my favorite place to be. And I love singing, it’s my favorite thing to do besides motivating. I’m continuously praying about it and asking God to deliver me. I’m singing and posting more. – I believe I’m special and God wants to favor me, but I feel like the devil is right in front of my calling and I can’t quite get to God. If singing gospel is my calling, I’d love it, but I want to know. I don’t talk about it much because I always get the “be a kid” – I understand I’m young but I feel like something in my spirit that says forget age, it’s about what your spirit desires and I believe AT TIMES my spirit calls me to ministry, but does it? Is this the devil stoping me and holding me back or is it my own self and letting my doubts and insecurities in the way of God and his purpose for me. – I’m only fifteen but I want nothing more than to praise my God for who he is! But I’m scared.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  32. Thank you Teya!!
    I hope I’m not alone when I say I know I’m special, but I don’t know that thing that’s so special about me, but I know all my scars, I can bond with my scars, and bask in the depression that they bring, and the whole idea of being late in life just taunts me even more…. I don’t think I made much sense with what I’ve said but I look forward to this journey with so much joy… Love you ❤

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  33. So lately I’ve been contemplating becoming a gospel singer. I grew up with God in my life, had some bumpy eras, moments when I’ve left him behind, BUT right now in my life I feel my relationship with God is stronger than ever. Growing up I’ve always pretty much loved singing. I grew up eager to know so much about God. I’m fifteen now and all I do and think about is when I’m going to get back in church to experience praise and worship again (probably my favorite part of church, don’t get me wrong I love the word, but I aspired and love to sing!!) – I sang a gospel song for my talent show and people loved it. I went home the same night having contemplated on whether singing gospel was my calling and I prayed about it and asked God to deliver it to me. I know I’m only 15 and all probably always get the “just be a kid” speech but I believe I’m different. I believe God set a purpose on me in ministry. I love motivating others, it makes me smile (evangelicalism?) and I love God with everything. I don’t listen to any secular music, only Gospel. A spiritual motivation app (sprinkle of jesus) send out a a message one day saying “stop praying for a sign, they’re reactions gave you your answer” (could it have been from the talent show when everybody said my voice blessed them in some type of way, or that I was really God and that God truly has blessed me?) another message said “don’t let your insecurities get in the way of Gods calling for you” (I get insecure sometimes, scared that if I put everything into this, it won’t work. I always get someone telling me “If it’s for God, he will bring you through, it will work it’s way” but I’m not sure:/) ( were those messages from God answering my prayers, or was it just the next message they had in their queue for the next day and it happened to be coincidental?) I don’t want to disappoint God nor myself. There’s so many amazing singers out here today, sometimes I necessarily don’t think would I truly make it. I love Church, it’s my favorite place to be. And I love singing, it’s my favorite thing to do besides motivating. I’m continuously praying about it and asking God to deliver me. I’m singing and posting more. – I believe I’m special and God wants to favor me, but I feel like the devil is right in front of my calling and I can’t quite get to God. If singing gospel is my calling, I’d love it, but I want to TRULY know. I don’t talk about it much because I always get the “be a kid” – I understand I’m young but I feel like something in my spirit that says forget age, it’s about what your spirit desires and I believe AT TIMES my spirit calls me to ministry, but does it? Is this the devil stoping me and holding me back? Is it God giving me these insecurities telling me “no,” or is it my own self and letting my doubts and insecurities in the way of God and his purpose for me. – I’m only fifteen but I want nothing more than to praise my God for who he is! But I’m scared. Does it really just take a leap of faith? – that can be confusing with how to do it and doing it in general is always scary.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

  35. Im so happy I landed on your page. I’m experiencing the same problem. This year I’m praying and working on learning to step outside my comfort zone, It’s not easy at all but with lots of prayer I’m getting there. Looking forward to reading more.

    Liked by 1 person

    Reply

Leave a comment